🎅🎅 CHRISTMAS BOAX RAFFLE 🎅🎅

Here we better get an invite an invite to ur fancy marble villa in the summer for a rebel weekender🤣
I'd love to fuck off to the sun (don't worry Stevie I'm no gonny run away with the raffle money, wouldn'y get me to fucking Blackpool) I hate this time of year, go to work dark and wet, come home dark and wet, it's shite! Absolute shite!
I was at a directors meeting for a national housebuilders years ago and the big question was why is the customer survey results in Scotland worse than the rest of the UK? I listened to many daft bastards giving many daft reasons, then someone had the daft idea of asking me.... "it's the weather, obviously!" Silence in the room.
Chief Arse says would you like to explain yourself?
"Aye I'll explain myself, punter from Dorset has a squeaky door they think ah fuck it let's go to the beach and enjoy our boat, punter from Lanarkshire has a squeaky door and they think it's pissing down outside, they canny escape, they fall out with the missus and it ends up being all my fucking fault because I built their house and created the squeak and the divorce is my fault, so when the customer survey comes in I get it in the fucking neck!
It's simple, it's the weather!
 
I'd love to fuck off to the sun (don't worry Stevie I'm no gonny run away with the raffle money, wouldn'y get me to fucking Blackpool) I hate this time of year, go to work dark and wet, come home dark and wet, it's shite! Absolute shite!
I was at a directors meeting for a national housebuilders years ago and the big question was why is the customer survey results in Scotland worse than the rest of the UK? I listened to many daft bastards giving many daft reasons, then someone had the daft idea of asking me.... "it's the weather, obviously!" Silence in the room.
Chief Arse says would you like to explain yourself?
"Aye I'll explain myself, punter from Dorset has a squeaky door they think ah fuck it let's go to the beach and enjoy our boat, punter from Lanarkshire has a squeaky door and they think it's pissing down outside, they canny escape, they fall out with the missus and it ends up being all my fucking fault because I built their house and created the squeak and the divorce is my fault, so when the customer survey comes in I get it in the fucking neck!
It's simple, it's the weather!
This weather is fuckin rotten that winds Howling oot there man it was pitch back at half 4 the day mate just fuckin depressing 😤
 
I like the fact that we have seasons. You get to enjoy lots of soup, wear your big woolly jumpers, Santa leaves preddued(only if you're good) and you get to look forward to spring again.
It's shite! It's utter fucking shite!
Let's go for a walk, canny it's pishing doon.
I'll cut the grass, canny it's pishing doon.
Let's go for a drive in the country, ok but we need to be home by 4pm or we'll see fuck all because it'll be dark!
Other than the upsides of wearing a jumper and eating soup it's shite Shammy, absolute shite!
 
Aye but when I’m lying in my love boat tomorrow morning nice and warm, while shammy’s on the way to work in the howling rain and 39 mph wind, hair like a hedgehogs back
I’ll be like

what was that about seasons

there’s only 1 season in my life and that glovetime

I know 🤦
Shammy I'm happy to beat the shit out of him for that, let's call it sisterhood! 🙄
 

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