Anyone got a funny story/joke?

[Weedocbhoy60]

I'll put this but all credit goes to The Shamrock for planting the seed in my head.

Stevie G...for Manager of the Year.

That's no funny. Cause it could actually happen ffs.

 

[Maria]

Was down the High At this am and decided to visit the ATM. An elderly lady was at the one next to me, she asked
" could you check ma balance fur me son? "
I said "sure" then I pushed her over.

?

 

[Weedocbhoy60]

That's no funny. Cause it could actually happen ffs.

How do you prevent a hun from drowning ........... Take yir fit aff his heid!

 

[The Shamrock]

How do you prevent a hun from drowning ........... Take yir fit aff his heid!

WHY would you prevent a hun from drowning?............just asking.

 

[Weedocbhoy60]

WHY would you prevent a hun from drowning?............just asking.

Good point ghirl. I'm gonna have to think long and hard before I reply.

 

[Weedocbhoy60]

Good point ghirl. I'm gonna have to think long and hard before I reply.

Still thinking and the only thing I could come up wae is ....
cause the polis were watching.
cause God was watching and HE says " for whatever you do to the littlest of my children you do unto me. So, even though the blasphemous hun slimeball deserves droont GET YIR FIT AFF EES HEID WEEDOCBHOY !!!!!?. "
"It's ma Job"

 

[The Shamrock]

Still thinking and the only thing I could come up wae is ....
cause the polis were watching.
cause God was watching and HE says " for whatever you do to the littlest of my children you do unto me. So, even though the blasphemous hun slimeball deserves droont GET YIR FIT AFF EES HEID WEEDOCBHOY !!!!!?. "
"It's ma Job"

???

 

[Wee Fergus's Bunnet]

A Priest a Mullah and a Rabbi walk into a pub . Is this some kind of joke says the barman ?

 

[TartanTim]

 

[Brimcbhoy]

Now this is funny, what phuqing sitter.

https://twitter.com/x/status/1110507402636357633

 

[Maria]

View attachment 2043

Omg

 

[tictastic]

A 3 year old boy examined his testicles in bath

“Maw” He asked “ Are these my brains”
“Not yet” She replied
one for the ladies

 

[tictastic]

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they're so damn good at it.

 

[tictastic]

Why don't cannibals eat divorced women?
Because they're bitter.

 

[tictastic]

Who is the patron saint of ‘reply all’?
St. Francis of a CC

 

[The Shamrock]

Who is the patron saint of ‘reply all’?
St. Francis of a CC

Can you hear me groan, tic?

 

[tictastic]

Can you hear me groan, tic?

my apologies Shammy.......must do better

 

[Maria]

Why don't cannibals eat divorced women?
Because they're bitter.

Not so. I believe we’re very very happy.

Keep deluding yersel Tic ???

 

[Ally]

Hear about the two homosexual ghosts? Kept giving each other the Willie's. ??

 

[michael duffy]

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they're so damn good at it.

joke of the month tic!!!! HH