Hoopy427
Well-known member
She was a wee mentalist, anytime I tried to take that collar off to brush her she'd claw the fuck out of me!
We can all use a laugh
- Thread starter DILLIGAF
- Start date
Magnificent 7
Well-known member
Mind and put your clocks forward 1 hour tonight. .or if you talk to any mutants it will be 55 hours for them 
tictastic
Well-known member
An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 2000 yen and walked out with $72.
The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $66. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.
The teller said "Fluctuations."
The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fuck you Americans too!"
The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $66. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.
The teller said "Fluctuations."
The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fuck you Americans too!"
tictastic
Well-known member
This rooster wakes up early Easter Sunday morning. He sticks his head out of the chicken coop, and sees all these multicolored eggs all over the barnyard. He takes a look at the eggs, takes a look at the hens, takes another look at the eggs, takes one more look at the hens, he thinks about it for a minute, then he walks across the barnyard and kicks the shit out of the peacock.
Tony Soprano
Well-known member
The Shamrock
Well-known member
I only drink on days that start with a T.
Tuesday
Thursday
Today
Tomorrow
Thaturday
Thunday
Tuesday
Thursday
Today
Tomorrow
Thaturday
Thunday
According to Saul
Well-known member
Looks like the speculation is over.
Press conference scheduled for 11am tomorrow at Celtic Park.
its believed that the new Manager,Hungarian Pulin Maleg,will be officially unveiled to the Media. Maleg will be joined at Celtic by his long time assistant,former Bulgarian international Uri Havnalaf
Press conference scheduled for 11am tomorrow at Celtic Park.
its believed that the new Manager,Hungarian Pulin Maleg,will be officially unveiled to the Media. Maleg will be joined at Celtic by his long time assistant,former Bulgarian international Uri Havnalaf
According to Saul
Well-known member
Just burned 2000 calories.
That’s the las Time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
That’s the las Time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
According to Saul
Well-known member
A school teacher in Glasgow asked her class,
”what football team do you all support? Raise your hands if it’s Rangers “.
The whole class raise their hands except for one child.
”Jonny,what team do you support?.”
The boy replied,”The mighty Aberdeen Miss”.
The teacher asks “Why?” jonny says “Because my Mam and Dad are from there and they support them and so do I”.
”Well you don’t have to copy them, what if your Mam was a prostitute and your Dad was a junkie?”.
Jonny replies,” Then I’d support Rangers like the rest of you dirty bast..ds
”what football team do you all support? Raise your hands if it’s Rangers “.
The whole class raise their hands except for one child.
”Jonny,what team do you support?.”
The boy replied,”The mighty Aberdeen Miss”.
The teacher asks “Why?” jonny says “Because my Mam and Dad are from there and they support them and so do I”.
”Well you don’t have to copy them, what if your Mam was a prostitute and your Dad was a junkie?”.
Jonny replies,” Then I’d support Rangers like the rest of you dirty bast..ds
Weedocbhoy60
Well-known member
Family of polar bears, mum dad and the wean, out on the ice.
The wean days "Da am a really a polar bear ??"
Daddy best days " of course you are, just look at ye, the spitting image of the maw. Big teeth 'n' claws, loads white fur and you just love that deal meat. No doubt about it you are a polar bear my boy. "
Unconvinced baby wanders over to his mother and asks the same question.
"Whit???" replies his mother " of course your a polar bear!! look at you!! Your the spitting image of your father. Big teeth, big claws and you just love that seal meat. Your a polar bear allright.
Still no sure he heads back towards his father.
"Ho Da!!"
" Whit noo boy ?? "
" Are you REALLY REALLY sure am a polar bear ???? "
" Of course am sure. Whits the matter ? "
"Am Fuckin FREEZIN ".
tictastic
Well-known member
How can you tell the difference between a male door and a female door?
One has a ding-dong and the other has knockers.
One has a ding-dong and the other has knockers.
That no the goalieI’m watching Dumbarton v Aberdeen.
Kamberi is wearing gloves.
It’s a heatwave out there.
DIGGER1155
Well-known member
Sorry getting more and more confused understanding football commentators can someone please explain
whats a false. 9 does he lie all the time or a spy for sevco
the number 10 does he live at Downing Street
number 9 they seem to miss all the time
where,s the hole ( don’t answer that)
defence attack. Thought Tommy Gemmel was the original?
anyone for netball
whats a false. 9 does he lie all the time or a spy for sevco
the number 10 does he live at Downing Street
number 9 they seem to miss all the time
where,s the hole ( don’t answer that)
defence attack. Thought Tommy Gemmel was the original?
anyone for netball
The Deadner
Well-known member
Bellshill bhoy
Well-known member
Getting pissed down the woods, takes me back to my early teens, deep joy, great memories
The Deadner
Well-known member
Lubos left peg
Well-known member
Tony Soprano
Well-known member
He ll look like hes been dookin for apples in a chip pan ...
