We can all use a laugh

I found this poem in a book I have called Poverty Safari by Darren McGarvey aka the rapper Loki. The poem is by a guy fae Pollok called Tom Leonard,

Efturryd geenuz iz speel
iboot whut wuz right
nwhut wiz rang
boot this nthat
nthi nix thing

a sayzti thi bloke
nwhut izzit yi caw
yir joab Jimmy

am a liaison coordinator
hi sayz oh good ah sayz
a liaison coordinator

jist whut this erria needs
whut way aw thi unimployment
inaw thi bevvyin
nthi boayz runnin amok
nthi hoossyz fawnty bits
nthi wummin n tranquillisers
it last thiv sent uz
a liaison coordinator

sumdy wia degree
in fuck knows what
getn peyd fur no known
whut the fuck ti day way it.
πŸ‘ πŸ‘ πŸ‘ πŸ‘ πŸ‘
 
I recently saw a banner at a Man U game stating "A game without Fans"
Etc. Attributing to Matt Busby. I was of the opinion that Big Jock was the origin of that quote. Any thoughts, B B
There was a lot hilarity when that banner went up - both on here and on social media - as it was obviously a Big Jock quote. Mat Busby then started getting credited for lots of famous sayings "One small step for man - one giant leap for mankind", " I have a dream", "Come up and see me sometime", "It's nice to see you, to see you... nice", etc, etc.
 
I recently saw a banner at a Man U game stating "A game without Fans"
Etc. Attributing to Matt Busby. I was of the opinion that Big Jock was the origin of that quote. Any thoughts, B B

 
A kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely".
To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's grey and cloudy". Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either." Finally, Billy raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said "No...But that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So Billy replies, "Then I definitely just shit my pants."
 
Here's George
He's Scottish
He's British
He's a HUN
He's British Born and British Bread
He's a Mutant, who doesn't use spell check
And hopefully, he remains a virgin for life
A great advert for birth controlView attachment 13019
View attachment 13018
Mind you DILLIGAF a great advert for what a thick zombie prick of a hun bastard is all about
 

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