In light of the ongoing clusterfuck which is the current tenure of our football manager, Neil Lennon, the Board of Celtic Football Club wish to make it resoundingly clear that we do not give a flying fuck about the fans feelings and we will continue to wilfully ignore the impending smash into the giant iceberg hoving into view.
The Board understands jackshit about the feelings of the fans and, as Neil himself has made clear, care even less about trying to salvage the situation.
The Board has carefully dismissed the current circumstances and the challenges of dealing with ungrateful fan groups, not least the pressure on the management and players in maintaining their market value and media profile. Equally important is to operate in accordance with the Club's current values which includes lining the pockets of our priority shareholders and CEO. The Board has come to the collective conclusion that the fans are all thick as pigshit and will swallow any pish the Board serve cold.
Even though results would suggest otherwise, Neil has the full support of the players and staff at the Club. He understands the pressure and the environment, even if that same pressure and environment previously led to a complete mental collapse into depression. As his outstanding record as manager, captain and player demonstrates, he once knew what it took to be successful at Celtic and even though he delivered success with many of the current squad of players, who so obviously now do not understand his methods and approach.
Whilst it has been suggested that it is time for a change, at this time the Board believes that Neil is the best person not to derail the gravy train and start making unreasonable demands of the Board.
The Board wishes to take the opportunity to say "fuck you" to all Celtic supporters for their financial support in this challenging year. The Board were concerned that Peter may not be able to afford the private jet this year, but thanks to the efforts of the support, Peter will be flying in style - even when the team are dropping like a stone. The response of the mugs - sorry, support has been magnificent. The Board wishes to make it clear that at no point, as inaccurately reported, have they referred to the fans as "entitled". The Board may have referred to the fans as "ungrateful loutish peasants", but the Board never referred to the support as "entitled".
The Board completely ignores the range of views expressed by our supporters and the unreasonableness of these opinions. Whilst there may not always be agreement, there is certainly a common (give or take tens of thousands of fans) goal - the financial success of Celtic Football Club. Now gies a' your money, suck it up and shut the fuck up.
Love Peter
