tictastic
Well-known member
Cheers Michael!!! made ma day..
michael duffy
Well-known member
boab1916
Well-known member
M
Maria
Guest
Someone told me a joke earlier and it was proper funny but my memory is so bad now with a penchant for self indulgence in bhad shit that i forgot the joke lol.
Would love to tell yeez but fkd if a can remember it. ?
Would love to tell yeez but fkd if a can remember it. ?
C
commodore64
Guest
old age ,, doesn't come alone
JimMc
Well-known member
old age ,, doesn't come alone
On the plus side it seems that farting etiquette, if it ever was a concern, is no longer.
Sitting down with a auld fella a few weeks back, helping him with some forms so he could get some help via the tax system he'd paid into all his life.
"I'll just get a pen" says he as he gets up off his chair up and lets loose a double barrel at ghost crows.
His daughter looking so embarrassed and disgusted, as off he goes and genuinely appears oblivious.
Trying not to laugh out loud, biting my lip at the same time as wondering if he was deaf to certain pitch tones, or selectively deaf.
Etiquette don't bother me, but don't like the thought of losing the control to make comedy when ever the moment is needed.
Then again farting has never been top of my ideas of a joke. Worked with a big fat smug public schoolboy type who thought it great for meetings, remembering even wondering once if he sometimes specifically set out to over eat just to perform his habit routine, because his abilities were not natural.
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M
Maria
Guest
My aunts funral today and back at the reception my brothers phone lights up.
Screen saver some 20 yr old scantily clad model.
I said sort yer phone ya pelmet ffs sittin next to my mum at a funeral.
Jeez. He still didn’t get it although my uncle was practically breakin his neck to look over his shoulder.
One of my cousins thought it acceptable to have 3 meals at the funeral lol.
And father hughes couldn’t resist a dig sayin my aunt rosie worked at coatbridge high she woulda been paid less than st pats. Fpmsl
Ooft i made my pleasantries and removed myself.
Oh almost forgot one cousin had his suit on but not in attendance. Apparantly in court.
Swear to fk couldn’t write it with the people im related to.
Screen saver some 20 yr old scantily clad model.
I said sort yer phone ya pelmet ffs sittin next to my mum at a funeral.
Jeez. He still didn’t get it although my uncle was practically breakin his neck to look over his shoulder.
One of my cousins thought it acceptable to have 3 meals at the funeral lol.
And father hughes couldn’t resist a dig sayin my aunt rosie worked at coatbridge high she woulda been paid less than st pats. Fpmsl
Ooft i made my pleasantries and removed myself.
Oh almost forgot one cousin had his suit on but not in attendance. Apparantly in court.
Swear to fk couldn’t write it with the people im related to.
M
Maria
Guest
Son just said why is every number scared of seven?
Coz seven ate nine ??
Coz seven ate nine ??
Noah Billy
Well-known member
Did ye know in St Lucia a steak and kidney pie costs 1.5 Dollars. In Trinidad it's 1.75 Dollars and in some parts of Kingston ,Jamaica it 2 dollars
That's the pierates of the Caribbean
That's the pierates of the Caribbean
Weedocbhoy60
Well-known member
That's fucking awful !!!! 'n' a cannae stop laughin???
michael duffy
Well-known member
nearly as bad as the pierotechnics post earlier!
M
Maria
Guest
michael that dude on your moniker scares the shit out me
michael duffy
Well-known member
father Jack,DRINK!!!!!!
M
Maria
Guest
oh freaky
The Deadner
Well-known member
Did you hear about the constipated maths teacher?.....
She worked it out with a pencil......
She worked it out with a pencil......
The Deadner
Well-known member
What's the first mention of constipation in the bible?.......
Moses took two tablets and went to the mountain. It came to pass......
Moses took two tablets and went to the mountain. It came to pass......
